Murder McMurderson link=topic=3.msg119#msg119 date=1142127391]
Wow. You've seen it all Sherry. I like the picture of you sitting up front with all the Polaroids. 
well, i'm old yknow. i'm 45. so i was able to see sp back in the 90s when younger fans missed it. plus where i live is close to chicago, so its easier to see him when he comes there.
the polaroids~ i had two cameras, and billy was making fun of me. "two cameras?!" and "it's not even one of the newer polaroids, it's a really really old one." (i think its like 20 years old!) at one point he said sarcastically, i'm just your poseable doll right now, and i said YAY! and he cracked up laughing. then, he held out his hand for the camera and said give it here. i said what? and he said give it here. i was afraid he was gonna break it cause he was so sick of me taking pics. but instead he held it behind his head and pointed it at him and me and took a pic of him with me in the front row. i handed the pic back and said its no good, and he said whaddya mean, and i said not good. (there was a shadow from the mic across my face making my face look all distorted and weird) and he said oh, you mean you. i nodded glumly, and he said SEE! SEE what it's like! and then i laughed.
i told him once after a hideout show when he said something, that was very funny. you should be a comedian. he said you and my three OTHER friends think so.
billy is very funny sometimes. he's no angel, he can be very cranky too. he has a smart mouth, and a very sarcastic sense of humor, and as you can see from his blogs is very critical of others sometimes. thats why i love that quote from him, i'm not the messiah, i'm just some jerk from the midwest.
i get annoyed sometimes when fans say billy is so sweet and such an angel and so on, because they think they know him just from his words and music and pictures and create this idol in their heads. he's no saint. his reputation for getting into arguements and shooting off his mouth has been well publicized. he got in an arguement i heard with the lead singer of the used backstage at the detroit zwan show, and the guy kicked billy. i personally disagree with the way he trashes others, especially the zwan members. how can you talk about how you recognize the existence of god on one hand and turn around and judge and harshly talk about others. but ysee, billy is just a very normal real human being. that irish temper comes out sometimes. he's not perfect, and he's not a saint or a messiah. and yet, i love him dearly just the same. he can be very sweet and nice sometimes, he is one of the best guitar players, he writes words and music that touch my soul and inspire me and comfort me like no other. thats why i asked him to sign the page with disciples in my book. because i am a disciple, not of some dream figure, but of a person who is a very real human being, and one i love and admire. it's not easy loving billy. if you ever met him on a bad day when he was rude or mean, you might be tempted to never like him again. and we've had our moments. but we got thru them. i think thats how you can tell when someone is really your friend, when you can get thru those bad times and still come out in the end okay. he's a lot like me, in the getting mad at people and never talking to them again. so i'm very grateful that we got thru any bad times and came out okay in the end.
when i saw him last year at tfe, i stepped away from the line of fans and stood in the middle of the sidewalk where he was walking up to, and grinned and held out my hands and said look, no cameras, and he stopped and held out his arm for me to come get hugged. as i stepped forward and into his arm, he said hi hon, how are you, and i said fine. only a month before i had pissed him off at the cd party constantly taking pics with this really bright flash, and there is a pic in the thread of the cd party where billy yelled at me and said ENOUGH ALREADY! and you can see the security guy looking worried oh oh she's pissing billy off, but i wasnt worried. i'm sherry, and he's billy, and it wouldnt be the first time i pissed him off or the last. in fact, i later at the cd party was standing behind another fan i knew who was really nervous and excited talking to him, and when he turned around to talk to someone else, i touched her arm and pointed at his butt right in front of her, and she giggled. so i stuck my arm around her and goosed him, and then jumped back behind her. he turned around and gave her this look, and she started stammering billy it wasnt me it was this girl this woman it was sherry billy! and i had my head down shaking my head in denial cracking up laughing, and she said billy took his marker and made psycho stabbing motions at me, and then she said sherry's crazy billy and they all started laughing. she thanked me later, saying she was so nervous she couldnt even talk to him, but then i broke the ice with my little stunt and helped her be able to talk to him like normal.
usually i would be more respectful of someones privacy, and i wouldnt advise anyone else to try something like that. but billy knows me really well, and it wasnt the first time i touched his butt. at the sp show in 95, he was standing inches from me and i reached out and touched his shoe. the security guy shoved me back and said you cant touch him! and billy was so mad the guy pushed me back, he turned sideways and pushed the security guy out of the way with his hip, and stuck his butt out so i could touch his butt, which i did very gently and reverently. ive never seen him in all the times ever do that onstage for anyone. he always shakes hands with the front row, but never anything like that. so ysee, we go way back me and billy.
but i dont usually like to talk about it. people always get the wrong impressions. they want to know if i'm friends with billy and can get ahold of him. no, i dont see billy except at public appearances. they want to know if me and billy have ever ... no i am not some groupie looking for a star fuck. they get jealous sometimes looking at my pics or hearing my stories. if they knew me, they wouldnt be jealous. and if they were lucky enough to have had all the experiences i have, they would be crowing to the heavens and strutting around like miss thang. i do not consider myself special or beautiful or have an ego, i have poor self-esteem and just consider myself lucky and blessed to have had the experiences i have. i am an old longtime devoted fan. i spend hours on the sidewalks to be up in the front row all the time. i try to do things for fans when i can like susan. all the chicago diehard fans know me and love me, and when i go to shows always alone, i always have lots of people to talk to in line. i was sitting in line once and a guy in line said i wanted to tell you thank you, billy threw a guitar pick at me once but it landed on the floor and i couldnt see it, and you flicked your lighter for me and then i was able to see the pick and grab it. i adore the fans, they are some of the nicest people. my car got towed at tfe and i didnt have enough money to get it out. the fans chipped in dollars, and gooch gave me the last twenty i needed to get it out, and since i was broke then, the fans fed me that day. one girl gave me a popsicle, another a pice of pizza, another a cookie and a banana. one guy gave me ten bucks for a cab to go get my car from the tow park. i love billy fans. and you have all been very nice and welcoming, and since its a small board, i felt i could go ahead and sit and share these stories with you. billy fans are awesome. i asked dave for an autograph once to send to a big fan overseas, and said i call it spreading the zwan love, and dave repeated it and laughed. but its true. what goes around, comes around. and when you do nice things for others with no reward, you will find it come back to you someday. susan the cancer victim fan keeps asking what can she do for me. nothing i insist. god will repay me in a dozen different ways. and he already did at tfe when the fans helped me. so next time you guys are at a show in line, bring a bag of cookies to share and talk to your neighbors. one of the great things about being a billy fan is you will meet a lot of other fans to be friends with in line. we share stories, i show them my pictures, they give me cookies... its a great life being a billystalker. ive had some of the most wonderful experiences anyone could ever hope or dream of. 8)
